Sunday, December 26, 2010

Well, that last one got me.  I had my last treatment of the two drugs on Wednesday,and by the time I got home that night, I had pretty bad skin sensitivity across the top of my back.  Throughout Thursday it escalated, but by Friday morning, I was pretty well done in.  I was weepy all day, and PJ and family changed plans and came to my house early instead of going to Auntie Roxann and Uncle Henry's.  I told him he didn't need to come babysit me, but he didn't care what I said.  Good boy I have there, huh?  I haven't felt great for over two weeks, and I really don't like that feeling!  I didn't take the steroids this time, and I wonder if that's why I had the pain I had.  The steroids were for nausea, and that has not been a problem, so I chose sleeping over preventing nausea when I hadn't had that problem.  The previous treatment, the steroids gave me insomnia and sleep-deprived Chris is not a nice girl!  The pain is now gone, I am sleeping, and only had a little nausea last night and eating oatmeal and Tums took care of that!  The next 4 treatments are a different drug, and nausea is not a side-effect, so no Emend ($110 a pill) no steroids, (Yea, I get to sleep) and longer treatment time.  I will miss those 4 Wednesdays working at the restaurant, but so far that will have been all I have missed.  On to treatment 5!

I had a great Christmas with PJ, Cassy and their boys.  They kidnapped me on Christmas Eve so I wouldn't be alone Christmas morning.  I think they wanted my orange sweet rolls I bought to enjoy all by myself.  Dad always used to make the orange ones for Jean and I because we didn't like the cinnamon rolls.  I love the cinnamon rolls now, but have to bake the orange ones for the warm fuzzy it gives me!  We took tons of pictures of Braeden and Gavin, enjoyed our rolls, and then went to Mummuu's and PaPa's house for lunch.  Great food, lots of family, and new hats from Tonya!  You should see that woman knit.  She is amazing.

I hope you all had a blessed Christmas.  Thanks for all the prayers and positive thoughts, they are working!
Love, Chris

Cold and Blustery

Still feeling very well, just trying to stay warm!  Some of you are commenting on having problems with this blog, and I am trying to figure out what I am doing!!  You do not need the www before the toomuchawareness in the title,  I don't know why.  I have redone the comment part so anyone can comment, but I don't know if I've done it right!  If anyone has any ideas, please feel free to let me know.  I am thinking maybe my format is too simple, but I'm not sure. Try, try again!  Hope all is well with you all, and keep warm if you are in the midst of this storm.
Love, Chris

Three down and Five to go!

Had my third chemo treatment yesterday, and so far I feel good.  Those anti-nausea drugs are FANTASTIC!  Today I went for my Neulasta shot to keep my white blood cells in the normal range.  I told her to take it out of the refrigerator at least 1/2 hour before I got there, and what a difference!  The last one I got hurt like a !@#$% and this one didn't hurt at all.  I am a happy camper.  It snowed today, and my neighbor Jerry Saier called to let me know he will plow my driveway/yard whenever I need him to.  One of my patients offered to take me to treatments if I needed, as did another neighbor, Diane LaChapelle.  Another patient offered to clean my house or run errands if I need her to.  I sure am blessed to be around so many wonderful people.  Yesterday Cassy brought me to my treatment and PJ picked me up.  Cassy made the most wonderful chicken enchiladas!  Braeden was kneeling on my lap and put his hand right over my PowerPort and leaned up to point to something and I almost went through the roof!  I grabbed his wrist and pushed him back and told him Grandma had an owie!  He looked at me and said 'urts'?  I said yes, it really hurts!  Then I showed him the band-aid Chuck the nurse put on it so he understood.  He just kept saying 'urts'.  What a dolly.  Those boys sure great for lifting my spirits! I stayed at their house until the Ativan wore off and went home.  I'm glad I did, because I slept like a rock!  Neulasta's side effects are mainly bone pain, so we'll see how tomorrow goes!  Last time my left hip was killing me by the time I got home from working at the restaurant, but 2 Extra-Strength Tylenol took care of it.  That I can live with. 

It's been a good week.  I got a beautiful bracelet from Emily's boyfriend Aaron, a prayer shawl from my Auntie Karen, and a chemo cap and sox from my sister-in-law Tonya.  The chemo cap I knew about, because Emily bought the kit and asked Tonya to knit it for me!  If Emily would have done it my hair would have grown back before she got it done!  I love you, honey!!! The sox, however, were a wonderful surprise.  They kept my feet very warm yesterday.  I have some pretty wonderful people around me, hey? 

Thanx for all the positive thoughts and prayer, and I hope everyone is happily getting ready for Christmas and feeling as good as I do!
Love, Chris

Sad Sunday

So, many tears as Emily left this morning!  She is an amazing young woman, and all I'll have to do is think of all the times we laughed this week, and I'll have a smile on my face for months.  I did find out she has her father's ability to put things together.  Move over, please, let Mom do it.  More laughter.  We were in Shopko looking for hats or scarves, and I had a tight winter hat on.  Packer hat to be exact.  I plopped a pretty cream wool bell-shaped hat on my head and it looked really cute!  Then I took the Packer hat off, and, of course, the wool one was HUGE!  You should have seen and heard my daughter.  I will never be able to walk into Shopko with a straight face again.  I guess I looked pretty ridiculous.  Things are going well, I feel good, and I certainly have some pretty wonderful people around me.  'That damn lump' is disappearing, and that makes me feel much better.  My next treatment is Dec. 8, so we'll see how #3 goes!

Keep praying, you are helping to keep me here!
Love, Chris

Happy Thanksgiving!

Many reasons to give thanks today.  Being alive is the main one, and having the determination to keep it that way is another!  Monday my hair starting falling out in earnest, and after waking up three times last night with a mouthful of hair, Emily buzzed my hair off today.  Before I took a shower I stood over the garbage can in the bathroom and we gently pulled as much out as we could so it wouldn't go down the drain!  The weird thing was it had turned almost black!  It was pretty strange.  But now I'm hair-free and pretty curious as to how it's going to come back!  I hope it comes back!!!   I actually have a pretty even head as far as bumps and stuff goes.  You should have seen the looks on Susie's grandkids faces.  I just told them the medicine they have to give me made it fall out, and it was all over, so Em buzzed it.  Preston and Laila felt it, but Corbin was way too busy.  We had a pretty good crowd at Mom and Dad's this year.  It was good to have so many of us together.  We have pictures of the brothers and sisters, and I'll post one as soon as Em gets home.  She forgot the cord to her camera, so she'll send it to me!  I didn't wear a hat, so you'll get to see the new me!

Thanx for all the prayers and good thoughts, I feel them all.
Love, Chris

Onward and upward

Today was treatment number 2.  Boy, my brain hurts from learning so much!  'That damn lump' is disappearing, and with it dwindle the risks of losing my life to this disease.  Breast cancer's favorite places to metastasize are the brain, liver, bone and lung.  On October 29 I had a chest x-ray.  Lungs were clear.  Same day, bone scan.  Same result.  Bones are clear.  Unless you count that arthritis in my neck! PET scan on Nov. 9 proved it is not in the liver or the brain.  Nov. 9 was the darkest day yet.  For some reason I thought it was in my liver.  I had a liver function blood test that was slowly on the rise.  That coupled with the fact my blood glucose level was high that day sent me right to liver metastasis.  PET scan was clear.  It showed the cancer in the left breast and the two lymph nodes.  Right where we thought it was.  Dr.Morel said there can be micrometastasis that are too small for the PET scan to pick up.  That's why we did chemo before surgery, so we could tell the chemo was effective for this type of cancer.  At the rate of speed this is working, he feels there is no chance there is anything else lurking in there the PET scan couldn't see. 

Today Dr. Morel could not feel any inflammation around my lymph nodes, and the tumor is even smaller than it was on Nov. 15.  So far the chemo has only made my color look like crap and made me tired.  After the third treatment Dr. Morel will call Dr. Salm-Schmid to confer about the surgery.  He is going to recommend I have all 8 of the chemo treatments then have surgery.  The outcome would be no different either way, he just goes on a patient by patient basis with this stuff.  We will see what happens now.  Emily will use her family medical leave act at that time, and earlier if I need her after treatments.  One day at a time, Sweet Jesus, that's all I'm asking from you.......................

Neeeeeext

Trying to make sure you are surrounded by positive thoughts, warmth, and love isn't as easy as I thought it would be.  There are many people who just don't get the whole idea of keeping a positive attitude and  how they step in the way.  Thank God there are great people around me that have offerred their help, travel to treatments if I need it, and anything else that comes up.  Empowers you to stand up to anything.  Even your second chemo treatment.  That's tomorrow.  Emily is here, and she will be there with me, so it will be better than the 1st one.  I was all by myself that time. Makes me remember back to when Mom was so sick and the decisions I made regarding the kind of support I offerred her.  I am really glad I made the decisions the way I did.  Anyway, Dr. Morel and I have decided that the tumor is smaller already!  I had ignored it because it was growing so fast, and never realized it had shrunk!  Made me feel much better.  Dr. Morel is going to call my breast specialist, Dr. Salm-Schmid after my 3rd treatment to discuss whether they are going to do my surgery partway through my chemo or wait until after all 8 are done.  It will be interesting.

Keep the prayers and positive thoughts coming, I truly can feel them.
Love, Chris

It's a new day!

So now I start a new foray into multi-media!  Jeni and Rochelle have fabulous blogs, and I figured this was a good thing to copy!  It is Sunday, Nov. 14, 2010 and I am working very hard on being a breast cancer survivor.  It has been less than a month since I found what I now call 'that damn lump', and things sure have changed!  I hope this blog will help keep my family and friends up on what is going on with one post instead of many.  We'll see if I can do it!